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Top 10 Things You Won't Hear from a Dive Operator when Booking a Trip

#5 "That whale shark pictured in our brochure is the only one we've seen in 20 years of diving here."

Top 10 Reasons Why Bill Clinton and Kenneth Starr Should Not Be Dive Buddies

#4 Ken would have to investigate all of Bill's past buddies.

Top 10 Reasons Why Saddam Hussein Doesn't Dive

#8 He quivers every time he hears the word "tank."

Top 10 Reasons Santa Claus Doesn't Dive

#7 Rudolph's nose shorts out under water.

Top 10 Reasons Why Diving is Better Than Snow Skiing

#7 It's hard to break a leg while diving.

Top 10 Things for Divers to be Thankful For

#5 Peeing in your wet suit doesn't attract predators.

Top 10 Signs That You Have Made Too Many Dives

#5 You worry that your office elevator is ascending too quickly.Rich Lockyer of Chino, Calif.

Top 10 Signs That Your Travel Agent Has Never Booked a Dive Trip

#4 He thinks Grand Turk is a hotel in Istanbul.squid_pro_quo of salem, Va.

Top 10 Lies Veteran Divers Tell Newbies

#7 That rip on my BC? Shark attack.Morad Hassan of Savannah, Ga.